I have always dreamed of being a mother. When I was in school my teachers would ask me what I want to be when I grow up and I would say “a mom“. People have different definitions of what success means to them and mine has always been to be a great mom. I spent years being worried I might not get to experience a pregnancy of my own because at the age of 15 I was diagnosed with endometriosis. Along with the endometriosis I suffered from ovarian cysts that were very painful and if you have had them, you definitely understand! However, I had faith that one day I would be pregnant because I knew and still know God made me to carry my own babies! The only way to overcome having endometriosis is in fact getting pregnant… seems tricky, hey?
One night I had an overwhelming feeling of wanting to have a baby with Michael. I was crying and I felt so strongly that it was our time to bring a baby into this world to love on. The next morning when I woke up I told Michael I thought I was pregnant. He didn’t seem to think it could happen that quickly b u t it does, it did, and I knew it. My body changed so quickly that the signs of pregnancy were unmistakable. I started feeling dehydrated right away, chapped lips and hands that couldn’t be smoothed with moisturizer. My boobs hurt almost immediately, faint nausea set in and I just felt pregnant. My nails grew stronger. I didn’t want to drink coffee. I was in a lot of cramping pain and it was n o t period cramps.
May 5th 2015, Cinco de Mayo, was the day I found out Michael and I were expecting a baby. I hadn’t missed my period yet and I figured I would wait till my period was late to confirm because pregnancy tests are expensive! I was already taking folic acid so I wasn’t too worried about waiting a few more days to find out for sure, but my sister spilled the beans that I thought I was pregnant so she and my mom came over with a pregnancy test. Somehow Michael was oblivious to all of this and didn’t know I was taking a pregnancy test… *whoops, sorry hunny* but I went upstairs to take the test anyways. Since it was the evening and I figured it would be negative because I have heard you are supposed to take your pregnancy test in the morning when you’re newly pregnant because your HCG levels will be higher… After the 2 minutes I turned the test around and read “Pregnant 1-2 weeks” – and I g a s p e d! I knew I was pregnant but I was still surprised when I read it.
Within two hours of finding out I was pregnant I started applying for a midwife. In Calgary midwives are in such high demand I thought I was about 1-2 weeks too late to send off the applications! Michael and I watched What to Expect When You’re Expecting while I sent off applications to every midwifery service in Calgary, praying we weren’t too late.
While we were waiting to hear whether or not we were going to have a midwife I booked an appointment with my naturopathic doctor to follow the pregnancy (if any of you live in Calgary I highly recommend Dr. Marnie Wachtler as a naturopathic doctor). I was having major cramping pain and I was sent for a ultrasound to rule out ectopic pregnancy because of the severity of the pain. Yes, thankfully it did come back negative because we now have a beautiful baby.
After 5 weeks of waiting I got the confirmation call that we had a midwife! We felt so blessed to be under midwifery care because we wanted a natural pregnancy and labour. We had a solo midwife which meant every appointment we had we saw the same midwife. At our first appointment I started crying right away because I so desperately wanted to hear our baby’s heartbeat for the first time…. and it came in loud and clear. S/he had a very healthy heart rate of 160 bpm which caused me to believe even more than s/he was a girl!
We decided not to find out the sex of our baby because 1. ultrasounds can be wrong and 2. because we were happy with a boy or a girl. My mom came to my 20 week ultrasound appointment with me and I was very clear to the ultrasound technician that we didn’t want to know the sex so we closed our eyes, and covered with our hands just in case we had the urge to peak! I missed hearing this comment from her but I guess she said “Good thing you weren’t looking because you would have known what the sex was.” Ha! And yes, we had a beautiful baby boy.
º º º º º º º º º º º º º º º º
I was so blessed with a perfect pregnancy. Perfect for me, that is. I didn’t throw up once but I sure was nauseous. For anyone who hasn’t have a baby, imagine being hung over all of the time BUT you don’t even get to drink! I had strong braxton hicks start at 16 weeks and they continued until I was in labour. I started feeling my baby kick early for a first time mom and at 17 weeks and 5 days our baby started really kicking hard. The best part of that first strong kick was my husband Michael was actually able to feel it. Baby D (D for Dozer, a nickname my husband came up with, haha!) was head down from 24 weeks onwards, sunny side up (but you’ll hear more about that when I post Williams birth story). My colostrum came in at 26 weeks. When I would go to my midwife appointments she would say that everything is looking great and refer to my pregnancy as a boring ol’ pregnancy because everything was going exactly as it should!
Between 36-37 weeks I started to get very uncomfortable in my low back… but only on my left side. Being in pain was the strangest feeling because I seriously loved every minute of being pregnant up until that point. I started going for more regular massages, craniosacral therapy, acupuncture, yoga, chiropractor – you name it, I tried it. The pain was dulled a little by the work but the pain wouldn’t subside so I started the eviction process at 37 weeks!
I started acupuncture to induce labour, taking homeopathic medicine, eating pineapple and spicy food, drinking castor oil, sex, walking, squatting, taking evening primrose oil… seriously. If I missed writing something down, you bet I still tried it. It really is true when people say the baby will come when the baby is ready. BUT PEOPLE, you don’t say that to a pregnant lady with raging hormones! We still want to feel in control of ourselves and of our bodies. With us crying spontaneously and having a human in us we so desperately want out so we can meet, there is no telling how we are going to react. I was reminded it’s God’s timing while I waited the 39 weeks and 6 days for my baby to bless us with his arrival. God knows exactly how long our baby needs to develop to be perfect for US.
Everybody is different, every body is different, every baby is so different…. every pregnancy, every mom, every experience. My experience doesn’t have to be yours. I do wish for you to have a perfect pregnancy, perfect for you, just as God intends it to be.
oh those baby feels 